Feminist List

I’ve been reading Caitlin Moran’s book, How to be a Woman, and the overwhelming message is that it’s great to be a woman. That feminism is exactly what you want it to be. It’s about taking all the bits you like about being a woman and having the choice to not do things just because someone else says so. It’s about doing whatever you like, reaping the benefits of being a woman. Looking at a situation and asking yourself: is it patriarchy that is telling me to do this? Am I doing this out of some consideration that it is a female’s place?

So, I am feminist. I love being a woman. Scratch that, I love being a person. I love my squishy bits and my tendency to cry at the drop of a hat and I like the way my hips move and my brain does math and eyes are blue. In loving myself as a person and a woman in this way, I am perfectly justified in believing in equality. Because that is feminism, idiots. No sarcasm, no irony, no fear of being aligned with a shouty self-righteous unwashed, unsexed prude. That is not feminism. Although, let’s be honest, I am shouty, unwashed and unsexed at the moment (I’m living on a boat with my parents, far away from my boyfriend).

I should have the right to the simplest things:

1.       To clean. Or not clean. Sometimes it is very therapeutic and I enjoy it. These times, however, are rare moments, much akin to seeing a unicorn. And yes, I clean, because living somewhere dirty hurts my mind a bit. And also, cleanliness is polite. A gift, to those around you. But it’s my mess. I am not immediately in charge of mess that happens in my vicinity. I also don’t have to clean the moment mess occurs. Stuff that, I could be watching TV.

2.       On that note, I will watch whatever and how much TV I like. This also applies to books. I like all genres and will watch episodes of the Vampire Diaries and Breaking Bad back to back. I will read Game of Thrones and Fifty Shades of Grey back to back. I will not be judged for any of this. “God, that book is trash, what is it about women,” when referring to Twilight or Fifty Shades is not okay. Yes, I have my own problems with those books, they portray unhealthy relationships in a stupidly positive light. But frankly, so does a lot of sci-fi and science fantasy. Which are not ‘boy genres’, thank you very much. I will not be told I am reading something that is inappropriate for my gender, or in words actually used, “Isn’t that a boy book? Why are you reading it?”

3.       I think sport is pretty boring. The off game, sure. I can get caught up in the excitement or maybe I know the players, sure. I’ll have a kick around, a tennis game with friends. Synchronised diving gives me a kick. Being told that I should make an effort to care about sport is ridiculous. I tried, for my family and my friends, because when you care about people, you should make an effort to explore their interests. But hell, that shit makes me crazy bored. Being told that I don’t like sport because I’m a female, is more ridiculous. Assuming I know nothing about sport because I have a vagina is bonkers. My mother and sister love sport. I have countless female friends who love it and play it. Give them a break. Even I know the rules to most games (I had the students explain them as part of an English test).

4.       I will not be whined at that women are constantly criticising their appearance, then gawked at awkwardly when I announce that I think I am good-looking. She’s a bit on herself, isn’t she? OH FOR FUCK’S SAKE.

5.       I will not be told that I get things because I am good-looking. The things I want, a job, a degree, travel, these things I will get because I am determined to get them. My father, during our current trip in the south of France has referred to sending me to ask for favours, when it involves talking to men. Old men, young men. It’s not that I’m the only one who speaks French. I don’t give a damn if it’s true or not. If they take one look at me and go, “oh, yes, I’d like a piece of that, I will pump air into her bicycle tires.” I like to believe that the reason people are nice to me here is because a) I’m making an effort to speak the language and b) I’m nice to them first. Simple.

6.       I also reserve the right to be a feminist and feminine. I believe that women should be equal with men. And if I want to believe that while wearing floral pants and a pink peplum top, it is my prerogative.

Yesterday, Tasmania passed the Reproductive Health (access to abortions) bill through the Lower House. I don’t have the words for how important this is to me. What it means. I have never had an abortion; nor am I planning (obviously) to be in the situation where I have to have one. But this bill isn’t about abortions, which happen anyway, it’s about safe abortions. And it’s about women having choices about their own bodies. Which is the most important point to feminism.

This is my body.